4/18/2005 12:34:00 PM|||Jonthon||| Last Thursday, I headed home to StL en route to Colorado to visit my grandparents. My dad picked me up at Wash U, where my friend Mollie agreed to meet him. From there, we went to Collinsville, where we met up with my brother to eat, and so I could give him some CDs he requested. We talked for a while, then headed out. When I arrived at home, I started doing laundry, which need to be done if I intended to wear clothes while on my trip. At one point, I took a break to go smoke the last bit of bubble hash I had smuggled home with my friend Cory. I got right back to laundry and packing when I got back, finishing as of about 4am, and got some quick shuteye. I awoke at 6am, and was ready to head to the airport. Ugh. We rode to the airport, listening to a lecture my dad had ordered from "The Learning Company" (Teach12.com) The set of lectures was about governmental philosophy, and the first one we listened to was "The Hindu vision." I encourage everyone to give it a listen. We then listened to "Power Politics and Machiavellianism," a sharp and bleak contrast. When we arrived at the airport, we got a big surprise. While waiting in security, someone asked the man behind me if anyone had ever told him he looked like Gallagher. He responded that no one did, because it would be hard for him to just look like himself. A few minutes later, the man asked, "So you really are Gallagher?" Gallagher responded, "that’s the second question you’ve wasted." I waited a bit, then asked him, "what’s the favorite thing you smashed with the sledge-o-matic?" He very loudly answered "stupid people. They always enjoyed watching me smash vegetables with a big hammer, and I took pleasure in taking their money while exposing them as idiots." (Or something like that.) I smiled, but couldn’t chat because I had to go through security. Damn. It was still cool though. We then got on our plane, and were on our way... We arrived in Colorado Springs, then made the hour drive to Can~on City, where my grandparents live. We stopped at a place with the world’s largest rocking chair for lunch. Later that night, we went out to eat with my grandparents and the other side of the family. The other side of the family. I will detail this situation and its relevance in a little bit, but for now let me suffice it to say that my "grandmother" is actually my grandfather's girlfriend who has been around longer than I have been alive (they don’t marry for war benefit purposes). Her son lives three houses down from her now, and has a wife (Leah) and a child (Jesse). So anyway, after dinner, we headed home. We chatted for a while, then I got out the air mattress I was to call home for the next three days. When I awoke the next morning, my dad and I headed out with Papa Les and Velma on a trip out to the Sangre de Christo (Blood of Christ, for you non-Spanish speakers out there) mountains. This took us all the way down to Westcliffe, Colorado. The scenery along the way was absolutely beautiful.
Beautiful Backcountry, captured by camera...
We ate lunch in a little restaurant in this little town, which sat at the base of the mountain. Notice that I didn’t say at the foothills – there were none. It was kind of incredible to see 14,000 ft mountains rising right up out of nowhere. From here, we headed out to Cotapaxi, which is northeast. A lot of float trips head out of here, and we headed there just to drive back along the river on our return. The scenic drive was really nice, but do to the fact that Velma needs to be kept at 78 degrees at all times, I was sweating and struggling to stay awake. We eventually made it to the Royal Gorge, which is reminiscent of the Grand Canyon but much less impressive. There, we found out it cost $20 per individual to walk on the bridge and enter what was just a shitty theme park. F that. I headed up the parking lot a little ways, and found a walkway down to a place where I could see the bridge and the gorge, and take some pictures. Granted, I climbed up on some rocks to get these pictures, and was in area I wasn’t supposed to be, but that’s how I roll. When we got back, we cleaned up, then headed out to the French restaurant in town (again, of course, with the other side of the family). At $25 dollars a plate, this was one of the worst meals I’ve had in a long while, maybe ever. Good thing the other side of the family had the common courtesy to PUT IT ON MY GRANDPA’S CREDIT CARD. I think they do this rather regularly. During the meal, Velma criticized my dad for always complaining about his back (curious, as she bitches and moans more than any other creature on the face of the Earth, perhaps combined). I find this crass, but held my tongue. At the end of the meal, my grandpa wanted to head to the car because his seat was hard. I helped him walk out there, then spent time with him in the car. Eventually, we headed back to the house. That night, I found out that my friend had lost his job, and also listened to Velma bitch some more. Again with the tongue holding. The next morning, my dad and I walked down to Lindell's house. He is a park ranger, and took us out to Colorado back country. The rock formations were beautiful, colored from red to brown to green. Pike's Peak was in the background of almost every picture. We traveled along the shelf road, and saw some people rock climbing on what looked like an inverted rock face. We drove all the way to Cripple Creek, which legalized gambling in an effort to keep the mining community alive. It of course just became a gambling community, and now almost every storefront is gambling, or dining and gambling. We kept on driving. After a while, we came to Victor, a mining town that did not legalize gambling. It's pretty much a ghost town now. Hard to say which one had the better fate. On our way out of town, we saw a decommissioned gold mine that was being whored out for tours. It was called "Mollie Kathleen’s," which I delighted in as that is my friend’s first and middle name. From there, we headed to Phantom Canyon, which was basically a road that had been through the mountains. The numerous bridges in the canyon were almost all curved, and I had never seen a curved bridge before. The mountains rose pretty much right off the side of the road, except for a few pulloff points to allow for passing. All in all, it was a good experience. Over the course of the drive, Lindell told us that a few of the areas had been deemed "ACECs," or areas of critical environmental concern. A whole stegosaurus skeleton had been found in the area, along with many other fossils. He also told us about PILTs, or payment in lieue of taxes. It turns out that the natural beauty of America is being pimped out by our president. Payment in lieue of taxes refers to governmental subsidies to maintain national lands, since no tax can be derived from the residents as there are none. To be fair, Clinton never paid all of the 25 cents per acre the government promises. Of course, he did pay much more than George HW Bush, and much, much more than G Dub. Republicans in these areas were a bit upset that Bush had decided to cut almost all of the PILT funds, thereby requiring area governmental groups to fire shitloads of staff and shut down a lot of sites. But alls well, because we didn’t want to pay the 3 cents a piece to maintain our country’s natural beauty, right Repubs? Oh, I guess you aren’t listening, because you’re out shooting your gun off. I only say that because most of the signs in the area, be they street signs or informational kiosks set up by Lindell's wife (also a park ranger) were riddled with bullet wholes. Smart. Anyway, when we got home, we cleaned up and headed over to Lindell’s house, where dinner was to be served. I played a video game called Prince of Persia with jesse, who is overall a pretty good kid. After dinner, I returned to playing with him. My dad headed outside to play with the dog. After a while, my "grandma" came into the room and said "He sure does have a stomach on him, huh?" To which I responded, "who are you talking about?" She said, "your father." I don’t know if she thought this would fall on receptive ears, but I responded with a stunned and offended "What?" My opinion of her changed in an instant, and I don’t feel any compulsion to call her family anymore. Especially when I realized later that she had removed my father’s picture from the mantle, and was discouraging my grandpa from using anything my dad had given him/them. My family is fucked up. I blame this bitch. On the way back home, I found out that most of my grandpa’s family hated her and avoided her company at all cost, and that’s why I’ve never been able to see them but once a year or so. Great. The next morning, I got up, got packed, ate a breakfast, and was ready to go. I said my goodbyes to my grandpa, hugged him, talked with him some, and told him I loved him. I may be a prickk for doing this, but I just tried to walk out without saying goodbye to Velma. She started to make a noise, so I put an arm around her and didn’t hug. She didn’t either. I guess most of my interaction with her in all of my life has been formalities. I’m done. My dad and I headed to the airport, and when we were almost there, I realized I had left my wallet and coat at their house - a big problem. Luckily, I soon realized that I had prepared myself for this, and had put my wallet in the cargo pocket of my pants. I guess I’ll get the coat and my MP3 player whenever I can convince Velma to give it to Lindell to ship it to me. Oh well. It’s getting warm out anyway. All in all, it was a good trip. The landscape was beautiful. The weather was perfect. I got all my homework done, and even caught up from my trip to San Fran. Most importantly, I got to spend time with my grandpa, which I think made his month or year. I realized I had been wrong about Lindell, who indeed had not stolen my grandpa away from me and moved him to Colorado. Rather, Velma had continually bitched and lied about my dad until Lindell thought there was a problem, then worked with her to move out there. In doing so, they sold their house well below market value, and bought a condo that was far too expensive, thereby squandering most of my family assets. I won’t hold that against her as I’m not too attached to money. But I’m kind of sad that any time I want to see my grandpa (the only family member other than my immediates that genuinely loves me), I will have to take a trip to Colorado. Ah well, at least the scenery will be nice.|||111394867012316736|||Colorado trip
