3/11/2005 09:20:00 AM|||Jonthon|||

The stimulus: Reasons Kinko's should be renamed Kink-no's
My response:
I am distinctly disinterested in patronizing Kinkos after an incident last semester. After a long day of designing and writing copy, I head over to Kinko’s, which is open 24 hours. Except its not. Because 24 hours really means “usually, but maybe not, especially not if its Friday night.” Rat fuckers.
So I give up, go home, finish up all other parts of the project, and prepare to be AT Kinko’s when they open at 7. Given, my presentation is at 8, and I will still need to spray mount my ads. Not a problem. Then I get to Kinko’s. There is but one man in front of me, and but one employee, who very well COULD have been replaced by a monkey. Only, if he were, he would not warrant even a full banana/hour in payment, because he was THAT worthless. And the guy in front of me wanted to print around 4,000 copies of something. I needed three color prints. He wouldn’t let me in front, and the Kinko’s ape couldn’t operate two things at once, or even one actually. So I bit him, thereby giving him rabies, and sprinted around campus (everything was closed), then gave up and went and printed 8.5x11s at home, which I then presented 15 minutes late.
Thanks Kinkos. I give you no bananas.

|||111055442388698797|||Give Kinko's Rabies